Where Art Thou?

Where are you?
You're missing so much right now
Do you know that?
I need you here to see
I need you her to feel
I need you here to experience
I need you to be right here, with me.
Where are you?

Everything in me is prepared, nothing left, just you.
I could touch your nose when I think you're being cute
I could embrace you anytime I want to show you that you're loved
I could draw soothing circles on the back of your palm with my thumb and tell you everything is alright
I could bring you on a night ride and sleep under the stars instead of scrolling through the screens
I could let you squish my face to make funny faces so you could have a good laugh
I could cuddle with you until dawn and you could talk about your life going on and on, tell me everything about you and I'm all yours to listen.

What would you be like? 
I wonder what is your favorite color?
Are you a cheese-maniac like me?
What if you hate durians?

Will you be jealous when I spazz at the girls?
I'm really looking forward seeing you someday.
But these day I am afraid, what if the day didn't come?
What if you never found me and I never met you?

Come soon? Please? I really need you in my life.

Love,
Me

Here I am, back from my National Service :)

I'm back from National Service. Guess what? I had a great time there. To be official, my camp is located on Semenyih, Selangor. I knw it's only around here and it's like so damn near =.= I couldn't control rite? Anyway, the full name of my camp is Kem Setia Ikhlas, Semenyih, in short, KEMSIS it's easier to remember obviously =/ Before goin to the camp, I knew WeiTeng and Nigel were in the same camp as me. So, yeah, I feel kinda lucky, at least I knew someone :) The thing I felt even more happier was, I knew more frens thr :D They're my gang..my Kemsis 8 pals :D Before 31/12/2011, I live my life without them. But when the clock strikes 12 and the date became 1/1/2012..I started spending my first 3 months on the year of 2012 with a bunch of person I do not recognise at all, which is my Kemsis 8 pals XD They were the bunch of person who gave me happiness and joy in Kem Setia Ikhlas :) I spent my days perfectly in the camp, laughters and more laughters everyday..We do crazy things like it's not anybody else's business, for example:

- scream our lungs out to support frens :)

- have interviews or ice-cream together during some special day :D

- run around the dewan makan juz to put cream on our fren's face bcoz it's that bitch's bday XD

- throw each others' shoe under the table and crawl under the table like Spider-man juz to pick back our shoe XD

- Play soccer with bottles in the middle of the night XD

- DETERMINATION is our quote but always fails (except Me and Zhou Yue XD)

- PERJUMPAAN HARAM which is eating in front of the toilet to prevent getting caught by teacher XD

- do ostrich moves n sing like crazy in the bus (i.e --> Grace XD)

- play in the rain n get ourselves wet or chasing each other around the dewan :D

Till the day of 17/3/2012, we are forced to separate and ofcoz I felt sad and heartbroken :( But when I saw them crying and hugging each other, I felt kinda glad because I know even though we're far apart, our heart will always be together :D

Should I?

wow I can't believe I came back after 5 days. I read a note the past few weeks and it changed me a lot. Previously I'm very sure how i felt for you, ofcoz I felt the same to you like before just, it made me asked myself "Is it worth doing all these?". Basically I'm holding on to something that I haven't got. You see, what I'd get as a feedback from you by treating you nice? The note says "Are you sure you're willing to sacrifice everything even though the one you loved will not respond to you? If yes then why are you sad?" I blacked out when I saw that line. I hesitated. Should I? Or shouldn't I? The past few months I've been sad, down and emo for countless times and I'm still blur by doing everything for you like crazy, but this 1 line, woke me. But, when I'm with you the feeling is still there just, I wouldn't gave too much hope to myself like what I usually did which may probably make me disappointed like hell. See? You seriously influenced me alot. What am I suppose to do in my life to hold your palms? What if there's no more YOU's in my life? I couldn't imagine those garbagey life. But nevermind, I'll just enjoy what I have now, with you in it :D

- Jenn - There's still a part of me that will always be in love with you.

hi again bloggie..

Last Post: January 30th

WTF? It's been more than 8 months I've dumped this blog. Poor thing, but I seriously have not much things so say though. But, today I came with something for my bloggie. Nothing special actually. One word - Friendship.

I couldn't really understand this word sometimes, although it is important to me. But why do people tend to ignore or even isolate it? The thing is, when you see it so important and you gave in all you had but no one tend to appreciate your pay outs? sacrifices? Whatever. A single misunderstand causes so much problem which are not suppose to happen between good friends like us. Sometimes I wonder is it worth doing these for yall. I do wonder, but, I....did not do it. After all these, what I've get for the feedback is way more worst than I've imagined. All I wanted is just a bunch of friends that I can share things with each and everyone of you. But things just got even worse than I've thought. Do I deserve all these? Maybe I do. Is it my fault? I'm very sorry then, don't blame yourself...what? Yea I'm so Great. How sarcastic.

- Jenn - basically blaming myself.

my 1st post..

Why do some people can hang out with their cousins so often?
Why can't I?
Why can't they?
sometimes I really don't understand those parents..
as if their bird brains are been stucked by SHIT.
SHIT SHIT. PURE BLOODY SHIT.
even if they LOCK their child at home
you can't guaranty they'll stay at their 'home sweet home' when they became adults.
REAL ADULTS I mean, or maybe Teens.
and once their out of their "Jail"..they will come home, LESS.
let's not go off my topic though..
I don't have any siblings..
I'm LONELY..sometimes..even if I deny from your questions previously.
but I admit..now x)
so, my cousins are quite important to me.
hanging out with them just like hanging out with my friends is MY DREAM COME TRUE.
and recently, I've been planning it..I was looking foward to it..
and then..something happened..
that shit-stucked-bird brain just won't permit IT'S child.(my cousins)
that bird even scolded someone, as if IT is the GOD of the house (DOG u say? xD)
IT thought everyone listens to it!!
who did you think you are?? KING OF THE JUNGLE?? THE GREAT MUFFASA OF LION KING??
NO, you're just a tweeny weeny selfish lil bird. shit-stucked-bird I mean. sorry I left that.
fine, I don't wanna talk about this now cause it's seriously affecting my emotions.

Reminder of the day,
Jenn, just don't give too much hope to yourself because you'll be so damn shitty disappoint straight towards hell.